Our Autism Story – Day 25 – “Babysitter…What's That?”
Between Brahm having therapy every weekday and behavior issues, we have a difficult time leaving the kids with “babysitters” like “normal” parents. On top of behavior issues, Brahm has other medical issues including food allergies, seasonal allergies and asthma. It’s interesting to see others’ reactions when we tell them how to use the EpiPens! Honestly, we are more concerned about the burden we place on others because watching Brahm and handling his medical issues can be a lot to place onto others.
We have been extremely fortunate that we have close family nearby to watch the kids. We have been even luckier that they are super helpful and want to watch them! However, that said, we still feel like we ask our parents for help more than we would like to. It’s just really tough when we can’t ask the neighbor kid down the street to watch our kids. We have only once had a non-family member watch the kids, and she was Brahm’s old senior therapist (highly trained and familiar with Brahm and our house).
We didn’t really have many “date nights” the first couple years after Brahm was diagnosed. We were so focused on Brahm and the kids that we kind of put ourselves last. We would have our parents watch the kids, but it was usually to do stuff (e.g., going to support group, attending work functions, etc.). It was only recently that we realized the importance of having dates (sounds crazy, right?!!). We have two criteria for dates… 1. We don’t have the kids and 2. We get out of the house, just us. This isn’t always easy given the difficulties of finding someone to watch the kids. So, we get creative! Something as simple as meeting up for lunch during the week counts as a “date” according to our criteria! We also maximize our “dates” if our parents watch the kids overnight – going out in the evening and then also going out for breakfast the next morning – that definitely counts as two “dates”!
P.S. – We want to give a HUGE thanks to our family that helps with the kids. We would literally lose our minds if it weren’t for your help!